The difference between being blunt and being a cunt.

blunt friendIt’s one of those quotes that every internetdwelling, memeloving someone has come by right? In my circle of friends I often get tagged in posts like that and a standard introduction for me contains the words “rudest girl you’ll ever meet”. The thing is: nobody else really wants to be the blunt friend, because the shoes you have to fill are mighty big.


“Hey J, I met this guy and would you mind going for a drink with us and telling me what you think of him? I know you’ll be honest about it and I promise I won’t get mad at anything you say.”

Questions like this make my skin crawl because I already know it’s gonna be a mighty uncomfortable event for me. As the title explains, I want to show you why I believe that despite of being blunt, I am by no means a cunt.

So. There I am. Caught between a rock and a hard place and despising every minute of it, yet I hear myself say “sure I’ll meet up with you guys. Just say when”. Now this can go just two ways actually. If you ask me to judge someone’s character you can’t expect me to hide my own. Being me I have the advantage of bringing out extreme reactions in those who get to know me and I use that to my advantage.


We meet up at the bar and there you are, nervously fidgetting your pretty skirt which I’ve complimented you on a million times and I know you did your best to look nice for him. Good job girl. The boy next to you stands tall but looks a tad out of his way, you must have warned him that I’m not the easiest friend of the bunch. Good.

Drinks are ordered -just a cola for me thanks- and we get to talking. Within two minutes I manage to bluntly refer to something personal your new crush has told and make some blunt, probably dark joke that is a bit over the top.

He’s up for bat now. As I watch his face for small signs of emotion I feel you looking at me with a kind of nervous smile on your face. You know that if he brushes it off, or even better comes back at me with some snide comment of his own, I’ll be impressed. But at the same time you remember that he’s not really like that. He’s a nice guy who truly tries to do his best for everyone and wants a better world. How could you have been so stupid thinking he’d be up for this. He’d have a chance against my dark broody nature? Fuck!


A smile corners his lips and his eyes soften as he looks at you. He doesn’t even bother looking at me for a second longer than it took to take a breath.

“I know what you mean now. She’s quite honest. She doesn’t like a lot of people. But she likes you. So see: you’re special.”

My insides feel like they’re tearing apart. On the one hand I want to lash him down with a good verbal kick in the gut, but something is stopping me. My goddamn conscience decides to show up and give me a little lesson. “Now J. Here’s the fucking truth for you”- damn this bitch has the mouth of a sailor, “if the guy decides to see the world in a brighter color than you do: you’re gonna shut that damn dark trap of yours and be happy for them. Not everybody can have your pessimistic outlook for the world. Hell, we’d all be killing each other over nothing if they did, wouldn’t we?” Well fuck me. She made her damn point and drove it straight home didn’t she?


It’s my turn to take a breath now. I know my conscience has won and I don’t mind one bit. As I sit back and relax I look at my friend too and smile. “So what do you do in life?”


The point of my little anecdote is this: yes I am honest and blunt and direct and you probably will at one point or other get mad at me for it. BUT I’m not a cunt. I won’t be cruel if someone is different just as I’ll never stand in the way of the happiness of the people that I love. I can’t stand people who hate or bitch for no reason. Not everything you say or do can always be liked by others but the basic value of respecting different ideas is something I treasure. Yes, I’ll make jokes about it and hell, some of ‘m will be fucking rude and over the top. But that’s just me. How this bird sings.

We’re all different and I respect that. We need difference in order to survive as a species. Dance to the beat of your own drum and do so proudly. It’ll only gain you more respect. And NEVER put someone down for having a different rythm than your own.





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